Joy

Today, I have struggled much of the day to smile.

I am burdened and weighed down and drowning to the point that I think all I can do is just lay there as the mountain swallows me. I have no energy left to save myself.

Do I even want to save myself?

The joys of medicine get lost in the politics and business and it is so easy to forget why I care so much.

But then God shows me that it is all a matter of perspective.

I have a friend, who is actually my hero. I don’t get to see her often, in fact I know very little about her life. As I have struggled to climb out of the dark abyss today, looking for footholds in the vast amount of paperwork and regulations and mandates, she shared her blog with me. It only has one post so far, but it reminded me of several things.

First, there is suffering in this world so great that my petty concerns are just that…petty. I did not have to fear for my life or the lives of my kids today. So things could have been much worse.

Second, what I do is a ministry. I pray every day that God’s love is visible to my patients, reflected through me.

Third, if people who have suffered greatly…who live every day with fear for their lives…who have seen the face of death over and over again…can have joy and love then I have no excuse.

If you are interested in hearing about what she has to say, check it out:
See her blog here!

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