Daddy

 Father, daughter heart shaped hands. 

“You know, you are super important. In fact, you are the most important relationship she will ever have.” 

He shifted uncomfortably in his chair across the room as I moved around the exam table to check the little eyes, ears, nose, and throat. He had just said that he felt terribly inadequate as a father, like what he was doing, trying to be there for his kids, would not ever make a difference. 

She giggled in spite of her fever when I told her I was going to check her snot boogers. All the little kids do…

“Nah. I’m just her dad,” he said. He cleared his throat quietly. 

“Exactly! You are her dad. You will be the first man who will make her feel beautiful. You will help her determine her self worth and from that, studies show, you will affect who and when she marries, her career success, her likelihood of using drugs or alcohol, and how early she starts having sex.” 

He cleared his throat again, this time more loudly. I looked over at his face. (The LUMP.) He was trying to clear the lump in his throat. There was a sniff, a few blinks. Then the moment was gone.

Do you see that kiddo? He loves you. Always remember that.

I listened to her heart and lungs, then she hopped off the table and climbed into her daddy’s lap where she rested her head on his chest.

“She has pharyngitis. This is probably viral so the focus is on supportive care for now….”

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104 thoughts on “Daddy

  1. How funny. I just posted — minutes ago — about my Daddy. He did all those nice things. Yup. He did.

    I don’t think any of us realizes the full impact of parenthood on our kids — ever!

    Liked by 4 people

  2. Ahh, such lovely words. It’s sad, so many fathers don’t seem to know that, don’t realize their significance and importance in the world. To kids, you really ARE their whole world. Father’s are so powerful that even their absence will have a huge impact.

    Then some people wind up with horrific fathers that do a whole lot of damage, so we have that brokeness in the world too. You want to really take it to the next level, our relationships with our earthly Fathers will shape our relationship with our heavenly Father. That father fracture is significant and profound.

    So all Fathers really have to do is represent God Himself. Piece of cake, right? 😉

    Liked by 4 people

  3. Very cool. Fathers seem to be diminished in today’s world. They either get ignored or a completely bad rap. There is also a push to make us all meterosexual. Dads are important, and good ones seem to sit in quiet oblivion. Proud of you for posting this.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. My dad was the most positive influence in my life when I was a kid and young teen. Godnose what I’d be today if it had not been for him. I’d give almost anything to have had the chance to know him, both of us adults.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. wow, thanks for sharing that post. As a father, I can relate to the man’s inadequacies sometimes not sure how good of a role model I really am for my kids. I know that people say “later they’ll remember that you were the one there for them” but what about now in the moment?

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Well dear goodness that made my heart want to do the vomit of happiness. I love your style! I find myself blurting out things like this a lot but the worst part is that I usually have the lump too!!! Sometimes if I catch wind of their lump I actually need to bail out of the room to gain my composure. Behaving kids makes you crazy sentimental and love every person who has a glimpse of what it takes to properly love and look after their child. Thanks for this one

    Liked by 1 person

      • Yes! My dad was busy running around with other women and creating new daughters to ignore. I don’t even think he knew enough to to that they’re scary.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. Beautiful.. too bad so many men do not realize their impact on their daughters. My husband is a good daddy to almost a fault…. His dad is also exceptional. My father completely blew it!

    Liked by 1 person

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  9. What a powerful reminder. Thank you.

    My relationship with my own father has always been fraught, and the longer I work to extricate myself from his influence, the clearer it becomes how deeply knotted he is into every bit of self-doubt, self-hatred, and insecurity I have. A five-word text from him still has the power to loosen my sense of who and what I am in the world. I am getting better — getting stronger — all the time. Today was a good day to be reminded that his influence over me throughout my developing years was NOT, in and of itself, a sign of my own weakness; this is just the way it is, between daughters and fathers.

    But not the way it has to continue being. That part is under my control, and I can choose differently.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Aw, I am sad your Daddy didn’t know how to be more open. It was as confusing and disappointing for him, too, which may have contributed to the down-spiral. Maybe he always looked back on those early days of your childhood as the best days of his life. Men aren’t taught to manage their emotions the way women are. They should be. They are just as emotional as women, but they bottle it all up and it erupts horribly sometimes. It doesn’t have to be that way.

    Liked by 1 person

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