I fell in love with the Chaos theory in high school after I did a project on it in my calculus class. Fractals are the breathtakingly beautiful visual manifestation but they are only part of the picture…
Order from madness.
Expect the unexpected.
A tiny change in initial parameters of a complex system will result in a completely different outcome.
What’s not to love? Very sexy stuff, really. (And if you are an expert in Chaos theory and I have butchered or misrepresented something here, I apologize profusely.)
Anyone who has had kids knows that getting them out of the house and off to school on time with your sanity intact is a highly variable process. I have written about my frustrations here before. Pardon me if I sound like a broken record, continually bringing this up.
I have found that just when I think I have it all figured out some new variable seemingly throws the whole system out of whack and I am left scrambling. Frustration boils over on both ends and devolves into kicking and screaming and sobbing.
(Sometimes the kids get upset, too…)
So with school starting a few weeks ago, the only difference, I swear, was that their clothes were different colors in the morning. Seriously. Uniforms were back in play. That was it. Everything had been working fine until that point. Now? Insanity.
How to fix this? The harder I tried, the worse it got.
Was the problem with them or was it with me?
I like control, order. I don’t like it for me per se. I like it around me. As I was yelling upstairs for the fiftieth time and getting ready to march on up there to start taking toys, I had an epiphany. Trying to micromanage this dynamic system was not working. Maybe I should try backing off, letting the chaos BE chaos and see what happens.
So I tried backing off the past few weeks. I wake them up, point out their clothes, and then leave. No yelling or shouting. The rest is up to them for the next 20 minutes. Provided they get downstairs by 7AM, there is no mommy interference.
And you know what? It works. So far. Most days. Two dressed kids on time, ready for breakfast, and a mom that is way less stressed.
Order from the chaos.
At least until the next tiny change in parameters to throw the whole thing off course again.
Now if I could just figure out how to mitigate all of the other obstacles to my mornings. Like trains. Crazy drivers. Stop lights. School zones. THEN, I could truly be happy….