My baby girl is turning five soon.

It is bitter sweet. On the one hand, I love watching her grow up, becoming her own woman. Sure, she has already formulated detailed plans to marginalized me and cut me from her life but for now she is still dependent upon me. We have fun together.

On the more sinister side of things, though, now momma needs a new IUD.

(insert groan of agony)

I have dreaded this day since the IUD was placed. I have enjoyed not having periods and not having to worry about pregnancy, having sex whenever I want. 


Insurance changes say I cannot see the woman who placed my last IUD (she did a terrific job) and delivered my last baby. I am only allowed to see someone that is employed directly by the corporation I work for. Aside from the fact my patients are not particularly fond of the OB/Gyn’s employed by the system and the fact that I run into these people at meetings, the records will be in the EHR that I and everyone else in the system use every day. 

This makes me exceedingly uncomfortable. 

Intellectually I know that anyone who is messing with my hoo-hah in a clinical setting is not going to remember what it looks like when they run into me at a meeting. They are not going to care if the area is hairy or smooth or if the hair color matches what is on my head, or if I have stretch marks from babies. I also know that, in theory, anyone accessing my chart will be documented and recorded and will have to account for why they are there.


How many sexual partners have I had? You can be dang well sure that I am not going to be honest about that question, no matter what the real number is. Am I engaging in risky sexual behavior? If I was, I sure as hell am not going to tell them. What about screening for STD’s? If I were in a situation where that needed to be done, would I be honest about THAT? No frickin’ way.

So, I continue to agonize daily over which physician I will end up have to spread my legs for. 

Decisions, decisions.

At least I have choices. Many women do not. 


92 thoughts on “Cycling

  1. Insurance company’s suck. I’m not certain I’d want my colleagues to have access to all my medical info either, much less my hoo-hah. That is, if I had one. That seems a bit intrusive to me, and a little too close to home.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I know people will say to be grateful for even having care, and they are right. It is most difficult for the people who had immense freedom of choice to suddenly have that narrowed down to almost nothing. I am fielding complaints from system employees daily. I think they blame me and all of the other physicians in the system, as if it is our idea. It wasn’t. Truthfully, I am too busy as it is. I don’t need a captive patient base to fill up patient appointment slots. It was touted as a way to improve quality, but the truth of it is, it is in place to manage costs. Managing costs, though, has its own costs.

      Liked by 3 people

  2. Congrats to your baby girl. Enjoy her for a couple more years before she starts telling you your nose is too big, or butt too fat. πŸ™‚ My daughter started that at age seven. πŸ™‚ Now I totally know where to get an honest opinion when I want to know how my dress looks.
    The IUD issue made me giggle. I started thinking how in Soviet Union all higher up folks who were communist party members and wanted to keep their positions had to travel few cities and few regions away to find a remote church to Christen their babies or get wed in a church, so that the party does not know. Maybe sometimes doctors do that for their ‘ceremonies’ πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hah! I thought about that, “traveling” for the “ceremony” and I am blessed to be in a position financially that would allow that, but I have two things about that which bother me. First, it is very expensive. After almost 12 years with the system, paying tens of thousands of dollars for my own locum coverage after my babies, the system at least owes me my IUD. Second, I have a problem with the elitism that conveys. I am not better than all of the other system employees. If they have to do it, so should I. πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

    • Probably a ton make that decision. I know as a physician the importance of being honest, though I will admit that I would outright lie in this context in a heartbeat. I think about psychiatric issues that are not getting addresses. Substance abuse issues. Potentially embarrassing GI problems. The list goes on. Sure, if people aren’t seeking care, it decreases cost $-wise, but in its place it increases the human cost.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Where does the time go? I won’t say anything scary about the next five years going by even faster. :/
    Delicate situation. I wouldn’t like to be in that position either–I mean getting checked out by a colleague or associate in the same medical practice. ;/

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh, gosh. I’m uncomfortable just reading this!

    Your final words are something I’ve been thinking on a lot the last month or so.

    We’re just about to run out of two incomes here. This means we’ll be withdrawing J from his daycare, which is a stressful thing for me as I contemplate about the point of our return to two incomes/J’s return to daycare … since, due to those recent California laws I blogged about, daycares can decide whether or not they feel like administering epinephrine. Right now J’s at a place that wouldn’t dream of taking food allergic kids without their epi-pens, which I understand more by the day is rare. It both ticks me off and saddens me. How are people charged with caring for kids able to make such a terrible choice? How did California legislators enable this choice in contravention of federal disability law?

    If push comes to shove, J’s grandmas can watch him as needed while waiting for a spot in an epi-pen administering daycare. That’s good for me and I’m glad I have the choice … but I know from my mom’s life what it’s like not to have any or good choices, and it frustrates the hell out of me that there are parents out there having to choose between staying home (which they can’t afford) and sending their kids to daycares that won’t take all easy steps to save their lives in case of anaphylaxis.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Isn’t that appalling? Haven’t insurance companies ever heard of human dignity? That’s a rhetorical question, I already know the answer. Bah humbug. It makes me crazy watching the human element taken out of healthcare. I am forever chanting, come on people, dignity, dignity, dignity, whatever that means, respect I suppose, privacy, compassion. It’s slipping away right before my eyes.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Personal privacy is a huge concern these days Victo. We all fight daily to maintain some semblance of privacy – the push of one button can transfer all our personal info anywhere in the world. Believe it or not I have a friend who visited a Food bank recently (he is on a small pension and is handicapped) and the Food Bank agent pulled up his file and his whole tax history from Revenue Canada was there.Unreal, he is in the process of filing a grievance with the government,.

    Anyway, my point is that we can only be as vigilant as is possible and then not worry about it. I am sure your doctor will be appropriate and understanding. After all you ask your patients to trust you, why shouldn’t you give your doctor the same trust?

    Liked by 1 person

    • The access to info is staggering and frightening. That being said, not all doctors are the same. Just because someone is qualified does not necessarily make them good. (As I know you have experienced.) Being on the inside, I know the scoop and it bothers me not being able to approach the system with the same trust that someone who does not know can have.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Do you have a Planned Parenthood or other women’s health clinic nearby? I would not have invested within my own company (and did not) for exactly the same reasons you’re mentioning. If it’s in the system, someone will look at it. Sorry that you are hemmed in on this.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I used to have health insurance but don’t anymore. I don’t qualify ( am self employed), for any sort of subsidized reasonable insurance because of my income but am not a millionaire and don’t make enough to afford the ridiculously high cost of insurance with very bad choices of doctors and unreasonably high deductible and out of pocket. So I pay for my visits. That said let me ask, if you went to your trusted physician and paid out of pocket, if something went wrong and you went to someone within your network would they not cover it because they didn’t install, sorry for the wording.


  9. Your hoo-hah is not going to care who does the job, as long as they are capable. You can always buy a inexpensive wig and if you don’t know the doctor that well they won’t remember you down the road, even if they do who the hoo-hah cares. Let it go Doc, your health is more important than your vanity.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Sometimes I’m glad to be old[er], especially after reading this post. No longer do I have to deal with any of that crap (other than my primary making me undergo that PAP smear last year, and even he didn’t bring up the subject again this year!). My feeling is that if you think the OB/GYNs in your system are competent, then go to one of them, but if they’re bozos, then go somewhere else. Make the decision the same way that any other patient would – consider your own well-being first. And don’t worry about the embarrassment factor – if they’re professionals, the subject will never be brought up outside the exam room. You certainly know which of your colleagues are able to keep their mouths shut.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. This really sucks. And you know what? If you were a guy engaging in “risky” behavior, well then your back would being slapped….

    I cannot tell you how much I resent insurance companies and all the shit they force folks to go through. The relationship with one’s doctor is really important, it’s not just like choosing a cashier at Walmart.

    I saw this article yesterday and thought of you. It is unrelated to today’s topic, but I don’t know if you read the NY Times and the author reminds me of you.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. You’ll likely remember them more than they will remember you. happiest birthday to the little one. They do grow up fast. My little granddaughter just turned six. She’s reading and writing and I am simply amazed. Don’t really know why, except life is simply amazing.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I’m remembering the team of 4 really handsome OB-GYN’s that I used during my first pregnancy, and laughing now about how all my friends recommended them, and told me they always dressed up, full hair and make-up to go for their visits. As if they were looking at any other end.

    p.s. Love the use of hoo-hah, Doc. ☺

    Liked by 1 person

    • I will never, ever be able to have a male OB/Gyn. I know there are plenty of really great ones out there but…. Yikes! This why when a man says he is not comfortable with me doing a prostate or genital exam on him, I completely understand and respect his decision without getting offended. πŸ™‚

      Liked by 2 people

  14. What a dilemma… Do you have the option of just going to which ever doctor you want and paying for it out of your own pocket? Or would that be prohibitively expensive there? I can relate to this because I have Ob-Gyn friends but when I had my son I purposely went to this hospital where nobody knew me. My friends would have waived their fees but the thought of them seeing me like that was just weird.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Totally get it!
    An unresolved lumbar herniation leaves me considering surgery that would necessitate lying in the prone position with my ass up on the air for all my peers in the OR to get a nice flash of as I am positioned.
    If there was some way to be awake, position myself ( while fully covered), then get intubated, I’d be like, “Yeah, let’s do it that way” :0

    Liked by 1 person

  16. A weird policy. Sort of mixing business with business…
    You should be allowed to choose your own attending doc for that, shouldn’t you?
    (But then I increasingly dislike and mistrust bureaucracies)
    As for “Baby” turning five… enjoy. (You’ve already planned every detail of her party right?)
    Happy birthday to both of you. (As much yours as hers)

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Haha, I like that even you as a medical practitioner finds it weird to be ‘worked on’ by familiar faces.
    A friendly male doctor once asked “ha, we can do your pap smear now if you want.” I was there a few weeks after my daughter’s birth. I told him I will make appointment with my GP for later date. I know he must have read plenty about me, but I don’t care, no way am I seeing a male doctor. I only see him for my girls’ because he is always very kind + attentive.


  18. I still find it baffling that insurance companies can have so much control over medical care…
    I’d offer to do it for you – you’d never have to worry about seeing me again and it would, obviously, be off the record. However, that would be an awful long trip for an IUD

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s