“Mommy, when I have a little sister, I want to name her Leia.”
“Leia?” I swelled with pride at my young padawan’s name choice.
“No! Not Star Wars. Lee-yah!”
“Hey, Mom, I want a little brother…”
Every evening, my daughter says a prayer asking God for a baby sister. Then she punches her brother when he prays for a baby brother.
The kids are ganging up on my poor uterus. What’s left of it, anyway. Between us, I think the hot flashes are its retaliation. The kids just don’t understand, no matter how many ways I try to explain it, that the physiology is impossible and I am not ever adopting another baby.
I was asked by DearLilyJune, “In what ways does being a doctor help you in being a mother? Vice versa?” And HotplateKate asked, “As far as questions, mine would be about the struggles you (or others) face combining medicine and motherhood.”
There definitely pluses and minuses.
For instance, I now understand the funny looks moms gave me when I asked if they were brushing their toddler’s teeth twice a day. Yeah. Twice a day. Hell, once a day is generally all you can manage when you work full time. And you know what? That is just fine.
Also, I now understand the whole first time mom pathology. I have felt that craziness myself and I am so much more forgiving and patient than I used to be.
When I have a sucky day, I can get some good hugs and kisses that make it 95% better. The kids make enduring the crap so much more worthwhile.
That being said, the kiddos also make things more stressful. I have to pick them up by 5:30 every evening, no matter what is going on at the clinic. I have to get them ready and drop them off every morning. I have no extended family that can help out at this point if the kids are sick or if they are off of school for a holiday. Their father steps in a bunch and is a huge help but there are times he simply can’t.
Why don’t you just get a nanny? I get asked that a lot. To be honest, that is a difficult proposition but even if I could arrange it easily, I want to be a parent. I want to be a mom. So I choose to engage in a precarious balancing act. So far, I am making it work. I love medicine and I love my kids. I am glad that I have enough flexibility that I can do both.