Dread 

Morgue at Ellis Island hospital

I dread going back to work after being off for a vacation, even if it was only for a few days. 

I know, I know. I’m not alone, am I? 

The thing is, I never know what my in basket is going to look like. After a regular weekend I can walk in to find 50-70 items on my virtual EHR (electronic health record) desktop. After a week of vacation it may be 150 or more. 

Please God, let it be manageable!!!!

When one of my partners is off, it is a full on life/death struggle to keep my head above water and I am certain they have experienced the same frantic craziness trying to keep up with my stuff while I’m out. 

Patients get crabby when their physician is gone and there will invariably be several fires to put out. Did the clinic roof leak again? Did my office manager actually reschedule the patients that I saw were on my schedule last Monday? Did that woman’s MRI get done? What did it show? 

It was not enough that I worried about everything all week. Oh, no. Now I have to face up to it in the morning.

Gah.

I won’t be sleeping well tonight.

*****************************************

The photo above is what is left of the morgue inside the ruins of the hospital on Ellis Island. It was a teaching hospital so autopsies were done in this theater. On the left is where the bodies where stored. I took the hard hat tour and got some really great images. I wish I could have gotten to see some of the upper floors, like where the ORs were. Maybe someday…. 

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92 thoughts on “Dread 

  1. Expecting the worst lets you prepare — and hopefully you will be pleasantly surprised. And hopefully, you won’t have any vaginal wasp stings to worry about. So you’ve got that goin’ for you!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Although not quite in the same category, I dislike going away even for a few days because although I take my laptop I only get a limited amount of emails. There are generally piles waiting for me when I come home. However, not the sleepless night type……

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I have a lot to do tomorrow as well. I will NOT have 150 tasks or emails or what have you, but I know what was unfinished when I left Friday.
    That dread you feel is how I feel after holiday weekends, when I know my workload increased exponentially on the basis of how other people celebrate. Just another reason to dislike Tuesdays in my case.
    I hope you get some rest, and I’m sure glad you had a vacation!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. All the best returning.

    That picture is really good. Before I read your post I had a hard time taking my eyes off of it. It just felt like there was a story there. Then when you told us what the picture was of. It made sense. Somewhat haunting.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Wow! You got to see this part of Ellis Island! Amazing. I loved the regular parts that anyone can self-tour. So many stories in those walls. It made me think of all the lives that passed through that space so many years ago and wonder what happened to them. Did they realize their dreams? Were their lives better here? So much to think about!

    Liked by 1 person

    • It was amazing. They are trying to restore parts of the hospital but it is not cheap and is a super slow process. I personally like that I got to see it in its current state but I hope they are able to keep it from deteriorating further.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Dread is a perfect word for how I feel about my job lately. It can ruin my Sunday if I let it. I imagine for you it is even worse with the hamster wheel of health care. I just need to hang in for a few more years and I am gone!
    I love the image. I also like to shoot ruins and old places. I went to Boldt Castle over forty years ago before they had done any work on it and it was fascinating. Now that it is all finished and “restored”, its beautiful, but not as interesting to me. But I am glad they saved it because it was being ruined by people and weather.

    Liked by 1 person

    • For years I would let anticipation of my on call week ruin my weekend. Then I stopped looking at the calendar. I just get surprised in Monday morning! 😉 I hope your workplace lightens up. It isn’t like you can ignore the calendar.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I’ve been working long enough to remember a time when you could go on vacation and people filled in for you and you came back to an almost normal day. We’ve long since “improved productivity” to the point where that never happens. Vacations are simply permission to procrastinate.

    I hope you find a lighter than expected load waiting for you.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. I’m glad you explained where the photo was from. I thought it looked like a morgue.
    There’s always dirty diapers to every job and I guess that’s it. Sorry Victo.
    Leslie

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I expect to face the same thing when I return (20 days is a long time!) – and I remember the chaos when I was still working. Good luck, take it slow and easy, prioritize and get some sleep!
    I would love to see that part of Ellis Island. My grandmother came through EI with her mother in 1908.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. The photo of Ellis Island (teaching) Morgue is fascinating. I like those chances where you get to experience what other visitors don’t. Like being taken “in” by animators at a living history museum for lunch and a tour of their herb and vegetable garden.
    I am fascinated by photos of abandoned spaces, including hospitals, and hope when you have recovered from recovering from your vacation you will post more of your Ellis Island Hospital adventure.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. As I was reading this, I wondered how you might feel working at one of our VA hospitals. Can you just imagine how the incompetence there might affect your ability to do a creditable job?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sometimes I imagine doing just that and stirring up trouble but it is such a huge system, so entrenched in its mediocrity, that changing the direction will take someone bigger and stronger than me.

      Like

  12. A lovely, honest post. Returning to work after a holiday/vacation is always difficult and your feelings show how much the welfare of your patients means to you. It’s funny how, after a day or two, it feels as though we’d never been gone! The old photo is intriguing and I’d love to delve into the history of the place.

    Liked by 1 person

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