Sunset reflected in a road puddle
“I want a wart removed this Friday”

“The doctor does not have any openings for a procedure this week. We are short staffed and she is completely booked. We can get you in on Monday if you like.”

“I am going on vacation next week. The doctor always accomodates me! You tell her I want to have this removed on Friday.”

I do try hard to get people in when they need it. But sometimes…

Honestly, it has been a rough week. 

With one of my partners out, our nurse practitioner out, AND it being the week before school starts back for many kids in the area… the clinic has been crazy. Finding time to blog/breathe/pee has been hard to come by.

“Fine! You tell her I am finding another doctor.”

It is like this every year. 

Next week it will be a ghost town around here but for now those emergency wart removals are killing us. 


109 thoughts on “Emergencies 

  1. Used to be that way in the dental office too. Everyone had to have their college students 3rd molars extracted over winter break. No telling them that they had already had a good 3, 4 even 5 years to get it done. It had to be NOW!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I always expect that there are likely extenuating circumstances that I am not privy to but enough for someone I have seen for over ten years and a good relationship with to want to find another physician? What else is going on? Maybe it really is the upcoming eclipse making people weird…

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I doubt I’d want a wart removed by an exasperated, exhausted doctor. My wife was a beautician, and she often got calls from people wanting an “emergency” haircut, perm, etc, that just couldn’t wait another day. I’d hate to feel so desperate that every little thing seemed like an emergency.

    Liked by 1 person

    • There are days you just cannot do more than what you are doing. There are many people who will ignore their crushing substernal chest pain but will not be able to get past a bad haircut. Your wife gets props from me!

      Liked by 2 people

  3. My goodness, how big is this wart that must be removed for vacation? Is it the size of a grape, on the end of her nose? Does it need its own swimwear? I mean, what’re we talkin about here? That seems irrational. Seriously.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. I’m just evil enough to love it when one of my clients threatens to go elsewhere. Less work for me – yay! But I’m not in the medical field, nor do I receive any share of profit from the business, so I can get away with feeling like that.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. My husband is a GP here in the UK. I’m a psychiatrist, so I’m a bit protected – and I have long accepted that my clientele are likely to be “difficult” – ( I say that with love and respect) – and it’s interesting that your blog, in a different country, with an entirely different system, so often resonates with the stories he comes home and tells me. It does feel like people are getting angrier, more demanding, and just plain ruder. I hope you get a bit of a break next week, and remember to breathe.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Triaging is one of the hardest things. Usually people listen to reason. “I need that slot for the puking two year old with high fever.” Less so of late. I blame a lot of that around here on the proliferation of teledoc and doc-in-a-box. Bad care right now is preferable to waiting a day or two for good care….


  6. “Say — what is dead cats good for, Huck?”

    “Good for? Cure warts with.”

    “No! Is that so? I know something that’s better.”

    “I bet you don’t. What is it?”

    “Why, spunk-water. . . You got to go all by yourself, to the middle of the woods, where you know there’s a spunk-water stump, and just as it’s midnight you back up against the stump and jam your hand in and say:

    ‘Barley-corn, barley-corn, injun-meal shorts,
    Spunk-water, spunk-water, swaller these warts,’

    and then walk away quick, eleven steps, with your eyes shut, and then turn around three times and walk home without speaking to anybody. Because if you speak the charm’s busted. . .Sometimes I take ’em off with a bean.”

    “Yes, bean’s good. I’ve done that.”

    “Have you? What’s your way?”

    “You take and split the bean, and cut the wart so as to get some blood, and then you put the blood on one piece of the bean and take and dig a hole and bury it ’bout midnight at the crossroads in the dark of the moon, and then you burn up the rest of the bean. You see that piece that’s got the blood on it will keep drawing and drawing, trying to fetch the other piece to it, and so that helps the blood to draw the wart, and pretty soon off she comes.”

    “Yes, that’s it, Huck — that’s it; though when you’re burying it if you say ‘Down bean; off wart; come no more to bother me!’ it’s better. That’s the way Joe Harper does, and he’s been nearly to Coonville and most everywheres. But say — how do you cure ’em with dead cats?”

    “Why, you take your cat and go and get in the graveyard ‘long about midnight when somebody that was wicked has been buried; and when it’s midnight a devil will come, or maybe two or three, but you can’t see ’em, you can only hear something like the wind, or maybe hear ’em talk; and when they’re taking that feller away, you heave your cat after ’em and say, ‘Devil follow corpse, cat follow devil, warts follow cat, I’m done with ye!’ That’ll fetch any wart.”
    – Adventures of Tom Sawyer

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Something in the air this week…this year… sounds like you need some Compassion for the Caregiver: now follow me: close your eyes, breathe three times deeply and imagine a place that makes you happy,…. and then imagine this person bleeding out… ooops just kidding on the last part…

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Wow. I would be ecstatic if my doctor could ever fit me in sooner than 3 weeks down the road. If you think you need to get in sooner, they tell you to go to the emergency room! (do they remove warts in the emergency room?) (K)

    Liked by 1 person

      • I can really understand that. It’s not my doctor’s fault; they are all subject to being way overbooked. Unfortunately, the doctors that don’t have to do that either don’t take insurance I can afford or have boutique practices where you pay large amounts up front for service. Doctors have to make a living too, so I don’t blame them.

        Liked by 1 person

  9. I’ve found that the people who wait until the last minute and then demand attention, are the least likely to appreciate the attention they receive. I was never dealing with matters of life and death, or even warts, but I think the attitude appears in everything they do.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Sorry you’re being bogged down by all this stuff. Is the wart removal wanted by people because of vanity or are they anxious in case it might become cancerous?
    My dad always used to get rid of any warts I had, he’d cut a hole in the centre of a band aid the size of the wart and place it over it, apply some horrid ointment, cover it with another band aid and leave it. Urgh, it went yellow and looked horrible but it did the trick. (The weird things I remember when I visit your blog!!)
    By the way, I absolutely LOVE that photo! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sometimes I think people feel that if I won’t get them in for their wart then I won’t get them in for their chest pain but the reason I cannot get them in for their wart is because I am working someone in for their chest pain. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  11. I can’t stand being treated like that. It pulls my trigger. I’d have got on the phone and told her to jam her wart straight up her pipe. Old hag .

    My sciatica is making me cranky. I’ve tried physical therapy, a chiropractor, Flexeril (knocked me out), steroids (useless) and Naproxen (equally useless). They gave me Tramadol but it’s an opioid, so I refuse to take it. Next up: acupuncture. Why me? Waaaaa. Why me?

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Rubbing with a raw peeled potao works psychologically. Also, soaking the wart or mole with vitamin E and keeping a bandaid on it will make it fall off in a few weeks, root included. For times when you can’t get a Dr or have no insurance.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Dear Doctor, I have a very sick blog. And it affects you. I have been told that you are now following abushietale.wordpress etc etc. And if you do there is nothing there and I don’t have access to it to put anything there. But if you are still champing at the bit and want to read my rubbish and write scripts for it you should go instead to https://abushietaleblog.wordpress.com/. Somebody put the word ‘blog’ into my site url and now it’s stuck. But I do want you to come back because I will miss telling you how great your life would be if you migrated to Australia.

    Liked by 1 person

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