Thursday Thoughts From The Throne #4

Today’s’ thought is brought to you by my upstairs bathroom….

I am a huge fan of grandparents. I really love celebrating Grandparents Day. I do NOT, however, appreciate schools celebrating Grandparents Day by inviting everyone’s grandparents to come for some function or another. 

Here’s why:

  1. They are invariably disorganized.
  2. There are always a fair number of kids whose grandparents are dead or live too far away to come.

My kids are blessed that they have a grandmother who comes to these things but I have each year encountered the kids who don’t, who are stashed in a back room looking forlorn and left out. It tugs at my heart. 

This year my kids were supposed to write letters and make artwork for their grandparents. Earlier this year their PawPaw died. My son’s letter read like this:

Dear grandfather, I wish I could still speak with you. Even if I will not see you, I will always keep you in my heart.

He gave it to his Granny instead. 

It was good on some level, helping the kids work through their grief but I sure do wish the exchange could have been done privately instead of in front of the whole assembly, putting their grief and their grandmother’s grief on display. 

And that is all my butt has time for today!


74 thoughts on “Thursday Thoughts From The Throne #4

  1. I like all the days we honor special relationships, but I completely understand your feelings. When I was teaching kindergarten, we had Muffins with Mom and Donuts with Dad and well, not every child has both and some don’t have either. I recently read of a friend who had Pastries with Parents, and that seemed much more inclusive.
    Stuff like that letter to Grandpa Now Gone really tugs at my heartstrings.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Grandparents Day is not a Thing over here, mainly due to a) it being a suspicious Americanism where marketing tells you what to do and when to do it, and b) the difficulty many Brits have dealing with emotions, family and our own mortality. Bringing the ages closer is a good thing, but I’m not sure I’d go down the route of having a special day for it – and your post has highlighted the good and the bad.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Honestly, we celebrate grandparents in my family on Mother’s Day and Father’s Day rather than having a special day for them but it isn’t a bad idea to stop and reflect on any grandparents are super special. They can add so much to the joys and magic of childhood.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. What a shame. I agree–not the best way to handle things. I’ve never been a fan of the day either, mostly because the one time I invited my mom, they sent her mail for years hinting for a donation. Once my kids moved onto high school, I never entered any grandparent address on the school form. I’m sure my mom is grateful for that!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. There’s already too many “days” taken away from regular old learning during the school year. I’m a grandparent. I feel no need to be recognized on a special day at the girls school. They make me feel special every time I am with them.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. You oughta be in a school staffroom when some starry eyed new teacher suggests we have Grandparent’s day and this old teacher brings up all the negatives that you mention. Then I’m accused of being an old grump.

    Liked by 1 person

      • I think that the world needs a grump now and then

        Who can show you difference of chicken from hen

        Who can walk down the street with a hole in his jeans

        From wearing them out day by day so it seems

        Who can say what he feels about this or ’bout that

        Without having to write it all out on his hat.

        Who can listen to kids who are just out of college

        And show that smart doesn’t always Β mean knowledge

        Β Who can sit down and talk to someone on their own

        While ev’ry one else has their face in their phone.

        Oh I’m glad that I’m old – I glad I’m not young.

        But I feel that at times I could do with more fun.

        Liked by 2 people

  6. That is wrong in so many ways. For us, half of the grands had passed, and the others lived hundreds of miles away…ugh. When did we all start buying into these manufactured “Hallmark Holidays” ??? I had no idea that schools were doing this. Your son’s response was so sweet, though.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Grandparents are special (I am one) but I do not see the need for it to be made into something special at school with some left out with no grandparents.(Sort of like Valentine’s Day for high school!) I never get a grandparents day card and that is fine with me. Your son is special indeed!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I agree with your butt wholeheartedly (or wholebuttedly, which might be more appropriate, plus my butt is substantially bigger than my heart :p). While people who have living grandparents shouldn’t feel ashamed of that of course, having such a display at school really puts those on the spot who don’t, and that’s hard enough to deal with as an adult let alone as a child. I always feel awkward around Mother’s Day, and it’s taught me not to assume anything, which makes me attempt to be careful and discreet around Father’s Day. If a friend mentions they’re doing something for their dad then I know it’s an okay subject to broach. Sometimes my hypersensitivity comes in handy πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Wow. Seems to me those kids that got left out should’ve been given an alternate celebration of some sort. If they were going to be kept separate, give them their own party. When I was in elementary school (3rd grade), I remember my first experience with a person of a different religion. We were all making door-sized Santa Claus’s to hang up at home, back when such things were okay to do at school. No one worried about political correctness back then. One little girl was Jewish. She made a clown instead of a Santa and was completely happy to do so. I suppose a more appropriate thing would’ve been a menorah, but this was 1967. The teacher tried to include her without offending her beliefs. I wonder today what the girl’s mom thought about the clown.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Pingback: On being a grump – Paol Soren

  11. During my son’s first Grandparents Day celebration at school, when he was in 5K, he had three sets of grandparents come. My stepmom told me about another little boy sobbing by himself because he didn’t have anyone. Absolutely broke my heart, if they’re gonna have these things, they need to figure out something to do with the other kids.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Agreed on both counts… As a freshman going on sophomore grandparent, grandkids are a blessing and the relationship with them is quite different. Now, it is true that some kids have lost or never had grandparents. Let’s turn it around: “Adopt a grandparent”. I’m sure some oldtimers would love to be “adopted”. (Thoughts from the armchair)

    Liked by 1 person

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